Phador the Almighty
by Lone Stranger
Summary: COMPLETE! Remus decides to come up with a new nickname for Tonks, but he lets a vital piece of information slip. Title makes no sense now, but it will at the end of the 1st chapter. RemusTonks Written before Half Blood Prince. No Spoilers.
1. Horoscopes

**Phandor the Almighty**

Chapter One: Horoscopes

**Disclaimer: I am not J.K. Rowling. So I do not own Harry Potter.**

**Authors Note: Hi, this is the 2nd half of Lone and Stranger. I had the idea for this one night as I looked at all of the nicknames poor Tonks has on this site. Although the title makes no sense to you now, it should by the end of this chapter.**

**This is only going to be 3 or so chapters long. I want to try and get the whole thing out by the Release of HBP…**

* * *

Remus John Lupin was full of sugar

He was sure it had something to do with the suspicious way Kingsley was acting this morning. 'Stupid Shacklebolt' he muttered under his breath. Everyone in Grimmauld Place knew that Remus liked his morning tea with only one spoonful of sugar. Kingsley must have put in the entire container when he wasn't looking. Remus was on a sugar buzz, and it took all of his strength not to bounce off the walls like a toddler.

To help calm his shaking nerves, he consented to reading the Daily Prophet, skimming over articles praising Harry and Dumbledore on spreading that word that Voldemort had returned. To Remus, it was funny how much money the Daily Prophet had now lost. First, all they did was scheme up stories on how Harry was going bonkers. Now they had to correct all of their stories. This had to have cost them a fortune.

He skipped to the Horoscopes page. Made by one faulty Seer or another, the Horoscopes were rarely ever true. "Today is an Eight" he said aloud. "You will be blissful, with a newfound thing in your life". He sighed. His days were always 'Eights'. On Full moon days, and even on the day Sirius died-he choked on the memory.

To rid himself of that thought, he turned to the sports.

The Ireland team was a shoe-in to be in the World Cup again. The Canada team looked like this year's favorite to beat, however.

A sound of bells arose from the entryway. Remus chuckled inwardly. Dumbledore was a genius. He had created a spell for number 12 Grimmauld place. If a member of the order (Or Harry, Ron, and Hermione) apparated inside the house, a sound of bells would chime, letting everyone know that it was safe. If buzzers went off, however, every Order member there would be at that doorway in a matter of seconds, wands outstretched.

Not really wanting to get out of his chair, he craned his neck around the corner, to see who was on the other side of the wall.

"Wotcher, Remus!" The magenta-haired young witch stepped into his line of sight.

"Morning, Nymphandora" He nodded a hello before taking a sip out of his Earl Grey Tea. Tonks blinked unhappily at his use of her first name, but she counted to ten and sat down beside him.

Like a little girl, she peered over his shoulder. "Anything interesting that's non-Harry related today?" He chuckled. "Not today…..probably never."

She smiled and looked at his discarded pile of papers. "Say, are you done with the horoscopes section?" He looked quizzically at her.

"I like to check up on whether I'm going to have a good day or not."

His quizzical look remained, although he handed her the paper. She scanned over it for a minute before she read aloud:

"Today is an Eight. Expect something to happen today that you've been dreaming about for a long time"

Remus chuckled. "My fortune was an eight today as well. Always has been, always will be."

Tonks grinned. "I know, I know. Horoscopes aren't true…"

"Right you are, Nymphandora."

"Remus…….what have I told you about calling me _that_?"

"I know, I know. But, Nymphandora is such a pretty name." He could feel the sugar racing through his bloodstream. This was not going to turn out well.

"Just…Call….Me….Tonks" she said strained though gritted teeth.

"Oh come now, everyone calls you that. I think I should come up with a new nickname…"

He pretended as if he were pondering. "What about Nymph?"

"Merlin, no Remus. That sounds terrible!"

"Okay. No Nymph………..What about….Dora"

She looked at him as if her were crazy. "That makes me sound like an old woman!"

He studied her for a moment. Then uncharacteristically, he broke out into laughter. "W-what about Phandor?"

Once again, he received the crazy-man look. "It's the middle letters in your name."

"It makes me sound... like an elephant" she said slowly

He pondered for a moment. "Actually, it makes you sound like a superhero." He adopted a squeaky girl's voice. "Thanks you for saving my family, Phandor the Almighty!"

He sat back down in his chair. Tonks was staring at him open mouthed. Finally, she collapsed with laughter. "Yes, Remus. Calling me Phandor is socially acceptable. That sounds soooooo much like a girl's name"

"Well, it shouldn't. I think of you as an attractive young woman"

He groaned inwardly at that last sentence. Why now, of all times, should he let something slip about his feelings? Of course Kingsley was partly to blame.

Remus smiled fake-cheerfully. "So, I hear the weather is going to be nice today" he said as he (badly) tried to change the subject.

Tonks just simply stared at him. There was a battle going on inside her mind. _Did he just say that? No…it was just a friendly gesture. Yeah…that was it. There was no way he felt the same way that she did…no…no way. But still……_ she smiled. Her horoscope said something she had been waiting for would come true today. Sirius had always told her that Remus fancied her, but she always thought her cousin was kidding. Maybe he was, and maybe he wasn't.

She grinned from ear to ear. _Maybe confusing the old wolf will provide me with some answers_….


	2. Confusion and Confession

**Phandor the Almighty**

Chapter Two: Confusion and Confession

**Disclaimer: I'm still not J.K. Rowling. That didn't change overnight. Therefore, Harry Potter doesn't belong to me…**

**Authors Note: Thank You to all of my reviews! This is the 2nd chapter of the story. **

* * *

_Previously: _She grinned from ear to ear. _Maybe confusing the old wolf will provide me with some answers_…. 

Remus was beginning to get nervous. His fake, plastered on smile began to waver slightly at the edges. Once again he tried to change the subject.

"Have you seen the latest Quidditch results? Ireland's leading the game at-"

She pushed her finger to her lips. "So Remus……you think I'm attractive?" She practically purred that line. Inside her mind, however, she was in a fit of giggles.

He had no where to run. His eyes darted frantically to the doorway, but she was younger and would beat him to the exit. When he looked back, he saw the strangest thing.

She had changed her hair to bubblegum pink, and put it up in pigtails.

_Time for persona number two, _she thought.

"Remy, do you have a crush on me?" He cocked his head to the side as she handed him a piece of paper.

_I like you_

_Do you like me?_

_Check yes or no…_

His head was still cocked to the side.

_Time for…me…the last step in teasing the werewolf._

When Remus looked up again, Tonks had reverted to her original state. She didn't 'wear' it much.

Her hair was long and sleek black. She had brown eyes, flecked with hints of green. She held a stubborn chin and looked at him with a curvy smile. That smile broke out into a grin.

"_Darn, she's really attracti-OKAY! Bad thoughts...bad, bad thoughts…"_

"So Remus, have you developed a crush on your fiery haired fellow-auror?"

"Tonks, I'm not going to give you any information."

A terrible exit, he knew, but coping with his feelings right now wasn't his intentional plan for the evening. Well, neither was getting a sugar buzz, but all thoughts of Kinglsey were gone for the moment.

"Okay then, wolf-boy. But I'm going to ask you one more question. Do you not not like me?"

"_What?_"

"You heard me"

_Why is she playing mind-games with me? Just to humiliate me more before she tells me to leave. Still, Sirius always told me that she fancied me…Never before had I ever believed him._

_Well, I was planning on leaving soon to go to the Quidditch World cup. Maybe I should just get this over with…yeah…then I'll have an excuse to go…_

Remus thought about the rule: Two negatives equal a positive. That meant the correct answer would be…

"No"

Tonks looked crestfallen. Her heart had just shattered into a bunch of tiny little pieces.

"B-but…I thought-"

He placed a finger to his lips._ It's now or never…_

"I don't like you, Nymphandora."

He stood up from his chair and walked over to her. He picked up her hand gently and brushed it against his lips.

"I love you"

And with that, Remus John Lupin softly met his lips with hers. At first, Tonks couldn't believe what was happening. Then, when she did, Remus pulled away.

"I-I've got to go"

"Wait!"

He turned around to face her, dreading the horrible things she would say to him.

She was touching her finger to her lips, as in disbelief. Slowly, she walked over to him. He cringed slightly, which brought her to giggles. "I'm not going to hit you, you big baby. I love you too"

As open mouthed as Hermione had ever been in her entire lifetime, Tonks was sure that Remus's fish-like gaping had her beat. She stood on tiptoe to reach him and hugged him around the neck.

Shaking off his apparent shock, he kissed her forehead.

"So Tonks, would you go on a date with this old and slightly graying werewolf to the Quidditch world cup with him?"

She laughed at his sudden boldness. "You're not graying, Remy. And I'd love to go"

**A/N: Teehee. The next chapter is about their "date" to the Quidditch world cup. It's the final chapter…. -Stranger**


	3. The Quidditch World Cup

**Phador the Almighty**

**Chapter Three: The Quidditch World Cup**

**Disclaimer: I.Still.Don't.Own.Harry.Potter.**

**A/N: I am EXTREMELY SORRY about this long delay. I was at camp, and then I had to read Half-Blood Prince (Took me about 7 hours, although I was interrupted plenty of times) Then I worked on Lone and I's fic, Welcome to Hogwarts.**

**So, to make up for the delay, I've hidden two book quotes in the final chapter. One is from another Harry Potter book, and the other is from another book, non-Harry Potter.**

**I also want to send out a HUGE thanks to the person who informed me that I have been spelling Nymphadora wrong this whole time. Thank you.**

**Once Again, Here is the final chapter.**

* * *

Remus absentmindedly sucked on a sugar quill, a thing he did when he was nervous. Today, he was particularly nervous, for it was the day of the Quidditch World Cup. And that meant it was his "date" with Nymphadora Tonks.

After about 10 minutes of nervous pacing and quill-sucking, he settled down in his favorite armchair.

"Remus, I'm ready to go"

He turned around in his chair. Tonks stood in the doorframe. Her hair was light brown and crimped, falling neatly to the base of her shoulderblades. She had on sapphire blue dress robes with a sparkly trin. Her face was heavily caked in makeup, and he noticed that she was remarkably taller.

He looked her up and down, cocking an eyebrow. "Tonks, what did we go over yesterday?"

She sighed loudly and began to recite something as if she had memorized it from a book.

"I should not try to impress you, because you are impressed by my beauty everyday."

He nodded with satisfaction, and she reverted to her normal, black haired self. Remus stood up and kissed her forehead. "Much better"

Tonks mumbled something with the words "stupid old wolf" and "looking pretty" before they apparated to the World Cup.

* * *

When they arrived, they got into a line with the other wizards and witches who hadn't camped overnight. A wizard with a secrecy sensor "wanded" them before they were even allowed to get near the stadium. They were the ushered into the stadium like a herd of cattle. Grumbling slightly, the couple made their way up to their seats.

Remus checked his gold pocketwatch: 20 minutes until the game started. A whole mess of shopping opportunities awaited him. He excused himself politley and made his way down to a souvenir shop.

tonks decided to watch the ads on the Jumbjotron to pass the time.

Ollivander's Wands

For all of your wand buying needs

Located in Scenic Diagon Alley.

* * *

Out Worrying about You-Know-Who?

You should be worrying about U-No-Poo

The constipation sensation that's gripping the nation.

Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes

Diagon Alley

She was surprised to see that add. So the twins had finally conjured up enough money to place an add at one of the most _prestigous_ wizarding events. As she thought this, she spotted a group of bare-chested wizards with the Canada team colors painted on their bodies. What sort of crazy North American ritual WAS this? (AN: Go North America!)

Remus returned a few minutes later, sporting a pair of omnioculars. He handed a pair to Tonks. "Remus, you shouldn't have"

"Okay, well I'll just take it back th-"

She snatched it away from him, rolling her eyes.

"I'll take that as a 'thanks' then, Nympha-Tonks"

"No" she leaned over and lightly kissed his cheek. "That's my thanks"

She smiled when a blush creeped to his cheeks. Their little "moment" was interrupted by a booming voice over the loudspeaker.

"**Ladies and Gentlemen, witches and wizards, welcome to the Quidditch World Cup!"**

A round of cheering erupted from the stadium.

**"My name is Lee Jordan, and I'll be your announcer today"**

"What happened to Bagman?" Tonks whispered

"I'm sure an army of goblins wouldn't be happy with him announcing."

"Speaking of bets, wolf-boy, care to wager against me?"

His eyes sparkled mischievously "What did you have in mind.?"

"Five galleons that Canada wins."

"Oh ho ho! Betting against your home turf, eh? Alright."

She started to shake his hand but he pulled away. "Nuh uh, Nymphadora. This has to be sealed with something stronger than a handshake"

She raised a skeptical eyebrow, and he pulled her in for a kiss.

Tonks rolled her eyes when they broke apart. "Were you always this silly?" He nodded. "The few gray hairs my mother has are from me. But I send home lots of money so she can pay to have them dyed!"

She punched him playfully in the shoulder. "I hope your mother beat you as a child."

**"The Canada team! Mitch, Davies, Austin, Cambridge, aaaaaaand Ellis!"**

The team took a lap around the stadium, landing next to their mascot, the Gryffin.

**"And now for Ireland's team! O'Malley, Dickens, Rogers, Harris, aaaaaand Brown!"**

The Irelanders floated next to a particuarly grumpy looking batch of leprechauns. Two of the leprechauns got into a fistfight, and in took four more to pull them apart.

**"Everyone please put your hands together for today's referee, Madame Hooch of Hogwarts School!"**

The Hogwarts flying instructor walked onto the field. When she got to the center, she sat on her broom.

"Riders, please mount your broom"

Once they were all on, she blew her whistle and tossed the quaffle into the air.

**"Aaaand they're off! Austin immediately got the quaffle. Pass to Davies, Austin, Cambridge GOAAAAL! Canada has scored the first goal. 10-0 Canada!"**

Tonks stuck out her tongue

**"Ireland's got the ball, Rogers, Harris, Rogers, Harris, Rogers, Oh that was a nice save. Back to Harris and SCOORE!"**

Remus stuck his tongue out this time. Tonks simply humphed.

* * *

Two hours later, the score was 200-150 in Canada's favor

"Why don't you just pay me now Remus."

One of Canada's team's players used a particularly good move. She peered through her omnioculars. Once identifying the move, she looked through the crowd.

"Wicked! I can watch that old bloke pick his nose again and again..."

**"I DON'T BELIEVE IT! BROWN'S SEEN THE SNITCH!"**

Ellis, who was on the other side of the pitch sped off towards Brown, but it was too late. Brown reached up and grasped the snitch

**"UNBELIEVABLE! IRELAND WINS!"**

An enormous cheer arose from the crowd. Tonks's jaw hung slack. The gryffins flew off in a huff when the leprechauns began a spastic dance.

* * *

After what seemed like forever, the cheering stopped. Everyone stood up to leave and Tonks got up to go with them. Remus stood up and grabbed her arm. "You aren't getting away that easy, missy."

She grumbled and grabbed five gold coins from her purse.

"Thank you. You know, I always get what I want, Tonks."

She raised a questioning eyebrow. He smirked and dipped her back in a kiss.

She looked up into his eyes. "Remus...I..I love you."

"Whatever you say Phador" he replied before pulling her into his embrace.

* * *

A/N: **Aww...anyway, here are the two quotes.**

**"Wicked, I can watch that bloke pick his nose again..and again" Ron Weasley, Goblet of Fire.**

**The other one is from the book Wild Magic by Author Tamora Pierce, If you haven't already read the Immortals series: Wild Magic, Wold Speaker, Emperor Mage, and In the Realms of the Gods. The actual quote is as followed:**

**"Does you ma know your this silly" she (Daine) demanded tartly.**

**He (Numair) nodded, comically sad. "The few gray hairs she has on her head are my doing **_**But -" **_**with an exaggerated change of mood- "I send her plenty of money so she can pay to have them dyed!"**

**"I hope she beat you as a child" Onua grumbled.**

**-Stranger**


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